Sunday, March 22, 2015

God Why Me?

After several discussions with mature Christians I've come to realize one very important thing,
we can't run from what God has called us to do. 
We are his disciples, which means that we are followers of Christ.
We are to be devoted to him.
So in being devoted to something we are supposed to focus our attention to that thing.
So then, why is it so hard? If we are disciples, why can't we just submit to God's will for our lives?
It's a complex yet simple answer, uncertainty.
When we are uncertain about anything in life we are apprehensive.
Just like anything we face, we as Christians are uncertain about what will happen in our lives after we have submitted to the will that God has ordained for our lives.
The best piece of advice that I can give to anyone is to ask God to order your steps.
This means that you are allowing God to lead you in the direction that he would have you to go.
In Jeremiah 29:11 the Lord says, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end."
There is a promise over your life as well. Not only a calling but a PROMISE.
But in order to get to our promise we must do what thus saith the Lord.
We can not walk according to what WE feel is right for our own lives.
Isaiah 55:8-9 tells us this, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways your ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts."
Sometimes there is no way for us to fully comprehend "why" God has called us.. all that we must do is accept it.
To further reiterate that our lives are not about what we "want" for ourselves there is Proverbs 19:21
"There are many devices in a man's heart; nevertheless the counsel of the Lord, that shall stand."
I'm not suggesting that we should not desire anything at all.. that's impossible.
But what I am saying is that our desires must align with God's will for us.
One final thing that I want to say is, do not run if you are chosen as well. You may not feel qualified but know this, God does not call the qualified he qualifies the called.
It matters not how ugly your past was or if you were never the one everyone chose.
God chose you!!
What do I mean?
You can be called but not chosen. The explanation is in Matthew 20:16
"So the last shall be first, and the first last; for many be called, but few chosen."
God doesn't care about what you have done.
I had to learn this.. acknowledging that we are unworthy and still being willing vessels means so much to God.
For so long I felt lost and I questioned God.
God why am I suffering? Why am I so broken? Why have you taken everything I love? God why am I in the fire? Why? God, why?
I was heart broken for so long.
Then one day God spoke to me, gave me my assignment.
I wrote this piece:

One day, God called out my name.
You know, I didn't really want to answer.
And I never have.
But I did this time.
I hadn't heard from him in so long.
What could he possibly want from filthy ol
me?
He said that he wanted to use me.
I thought this was absurd.
But then again, his power took mud and made a blind man see.

I still wonder, what makes me so special? 
But I know that there is something inside of me that the world needs.
I know that I have to have the courage of David, the obedience of Moses, I have to have the faith of Job!!
Though you slay me yet will I trust you.
I know, I know that I am revolutionary. 
Day by day I am able to say something bolder than the old me ever could!!
Today, I am able to say this; no matter what it takes, no matter what I will suffer, I want to be used.
My daily prayer is for God to give me the strength to endure what is ahead.
My generation is the generation that can change the world.. we can be like Joshua.
Why not us?
We can't run anyway.

"I want to live a life poured out. We can change the world"- William McDowell

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